Dear God....

I've been catching up on my correspondence....

Dear Mr Obama

I note with interest your anger and frustration regarding the oil spill in the Gulf of Mexico. It is interesting to note how much tax revenue the US has made from the oil industry, how many people are employed by it, how much political power it has exerted. Interesting too to note that the US is one of the most voracious users of oil based products and that the US has persistently been the last nation to sign off on the reduction of carbon emissions. So, in summary, the US has an insatiable thirst for oil and has previously dragged its feet on any changes that would have reduced demand or increased the price - placing huge pressure on the companies to produce cheap oil. I wonder then how the US would respond to a different type of  oil disaster? Say an American ship with American oil sailing from one part of the US to another. Oh, the Exxon Valdez, the one where your courts kept finding ways of reducing the damages - and then sold the repaired ship so that it is still in service...

But of course, the biggest oil related disaster is well away from US territory. It's called Iraq.

So can I respectfully suggest that you stop BP - Barak Posturing that is.

Yours etc,


Dear Mr Capello

I wonder if I could call you Fabio - given how much we English are paying you, I feel it is the least you could do. Now, I realise that you must be receiving a great deal of advice at the moment and I freely admit that I am not an expert in football tactics, but then it seems clear that in this respect we are very similar. I am however passionate about seeing people fulfil their gifting. Seeing players of proven ability playing with shackles, out of position and with no visible plan seems a criminal waste. Gerard and Lampard have never worked well together and Heskey, really? The same Heskey who came on as a sub in the last world-cup and tried defending only to give away the free-kick which looped over Seaman's head, knocking us out of the competition? Ok, so I know I should exercise more forgiveness but even so. I hear you tried to persuade Scholes out of retirement - why not Gary Lineker, he'd have more chance than the ones you played the other night. So, my advice. Don't rely on big names. Get everyone to work for everyone else based on their unique gifting. It creates this amazing thing called team.

Yours etc,


Dear Dr Who,

I really like the Tardis and appreciate that your time is much in demand. However, I have a number of projects for you - some are pretty big picture, others I admit somewhat personal. Firstly, if you could go back in time and prevent the birth of Adlof Hitler, I think most people would agree that this would have a beneficial outcome. Secondly, and I know this might seem less cosmically important, but nipping forward a week and bringing back the lottery numbers for my friend would help if her washing machine breaks again.

But here's the biggy. I'd like you to go back and have a word with Eve. Tell her not to eat it. Tell her the serpent is lying. Come to think of it, tell her about six million Jews, tell her about my friend. If that works out, you won't need to do anything ever again.

Yours etc,


Dear God,

You probably know the content of the other letters without me going over them all. If I'm honest (and I guess that would be best), I'm a bit fed up with hypocrisy in high places. I get disappointed with people underperforming when I trust them. I feel distressed when people live in black and white instead of colour. And I wish you would use some omnipotence to intervene at key points to prevent the suffering.

But I just want to say this. I love that you give me significance. I love that you let me and Mr Obama and Fabio make choices, even when they lead to disaster. Because only then can we produce beauty, make choices that build for eternity. And I know therefore that you have to give that same capacity to choose to a Hitler with the capacity to affect millions. That if a just God were to intervene and stop the monster, he would have to intervene to stop us too.

So, thank you. Thank you for this immense privilege. Help me make those good choices. Help me be worthy of your trust.

Yours....